Make Bad Times Better

Don't miss any Bottom Line Secrets. Add our address, bottomlinesecrets@ebls.bottomlinesecrets.com, to your Address Book or Safe List. Learn how here. February 4, 2011 Forever Young How to Overcome Life's Disappointments No Plunger? No Problem. Secret to Unplugging Your Toilet Cheap, Uncertified Electrical Items Can Be Dangerous Introducing Bottom Line on the Radio (and Listen Live on the Web) Dear healthwellness82@gmail.com, Have you read the best-selling book When Bad Things Happen to Good People, by Rabbi Harold S. Kushner? His eloquent advice on how to keep going through unbearable sadness should be required reading -- but if you don’t have time, you will still benefit from this shorter version of his advice. Rabbi Kushner shares six life-changing insights and strategies -- they’ll help with whatever sorrow you face. Some people even find that his wise words work when times aren’t so bad. Saving money is never worth putting your life at risk -- buying certain bargain electronics can end up doing just that. Anthony Toderian, spokesperson for the electronic-testing agency CSA International, shares a list of electrical items that aren’t worth skimping on if you value your safety. All the best, Jessica Kent Editor BottomLineSecrets.com Forever Young Getting old can be awful. Aches... pains... illness... constant bouncing from doctor to doctor. We all dread it. You can't stop the clock, but you can banish the miseries that sometimes come with it. Bulging belly Cholesterol-choked arteries Brain failure and fatigue Weakness and impotence Frozen joints or back pain Spotted, decrepit skin Tumors taking over your body Parkinson's tremors Menopausal miseries Fading, cloudy vision And all other indignities of aging! Read on... How to Overcome Life's Disappointments Rabbi Harold S. Kushner Most of us must face the disappointment of not having all of our dreams come true. The fact that we experience failure does not make us failures -- although the way in which we respond to our failures could do exactly that. Here’s what to do when you have trouble getting past life’s disappointments... Remember for whom you are working -- you. The promotion you had hoped for went to someone else... your family doesn’t appreciate the many things you do for them. It is natural to feel disappointment when things like this occur, but our mistake is to rely on others for validation. We should work hard because to do any less would be letting ourselves down. We should work hard for the sake of our own sense of integrity and knowing we have done our best. Understand that those who have never been disappointed are the real failures. People who achieve everything they set out to achieve in life obviously have set their bars too low. We achieve more if we aim high -- though this also means that we will be disappointed more often, because lofty goals are difficult to reach. Understand that disappointments are inevitable when we strive for greatness, and consider your life successful if you accomplish just a fraction of your goals. Escape the isolation of disappointment. We feel alone when we lose a loved one... suffer a life-threatening illness... or experience a major financial setback. Our loneliness then drives us further into despair. Example: My wife and I saw only happy families around us when one of our children was seriously ill. Not until after our child had died did we discover that other families we knew had gone through similar ordeals. A tragedy does not separate us from everyone else. Sharing our grief brings us closer to the brotherhood of the afflicted, a huge club consisting of everyone who has ever endured pain or inequity. Our misfortune even makes us qualified to help other grieving people. Assisting others can get us past the sense of helplessness that often comes with major disappointments. Keep disappointments in perspective. Try to remember what was worrying you two weeks ago. Many people cannot. Most disappointments are less consequential than we feel they are at the time. Psychiatrist George Vaillant, MD, director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, which followed 800 men for five decades, found that it is not the bad things that happen to us that stay with us in life -- it is the good people we meet along the way. People who handle misfortune best are the ones who focus not on what happened to them but on all the people who rallied around them when it happened. Fashion a new dream. There’s no reason that you have to let the failure of one dream stop you from dreaming -- and trying. The experience you have gained can help you create a new, more realistic and achievable dream. Example: When Al Gore lost the presidential election, he recast his dream. He moved from politics to environmentalism, producing a highly acclaimed documentary on global warming called An Inconvenient Truth. His success and impact have been tremendous since his “failure.” Get angry with God. Some people consider it wrong to get angry with God. I believe that if we cannot get angry with God, then we have a constrained, artificial relationship with God. When the world disappoints you, go ahead and blame God. Vent your anger, and bemoan the inequity. Voicing unhappiness with life’s disappointments brings you closer to moving beyond them. God does not mind. He will continue to stand by you no matter how angry you become. God understands that you really are getting mad at your misfortune, not at Him. WHEN OTHER PEOPLE DISAPPOINT US The friends, coworkers and loved ones on whom we rely sometimes will disappoint us. Two ways to forgive them... Don’t focus on the mistake. Before ending a relationship based on a single failure -- however great -- consider this person in full. Think about who he/she has been in the past and who he can become in the future. Example: A husband cheats on his wife. The wife might choose to end the relationship, but she also might choose to view this as a single error from a loving but flawed partner. Consider forgiveness a favor that you do for yourself. People often believe that if they forgive those who have wronged them, the transgressors “get away with” the misdeeds. But forgiveness benefits you more than the transgressor. Offering forgiveness removes a heavy burden that you have been carrying around. It cleanses your soul and eases your pain. The sooner you forgive, the sooner you can move on from your disappointment. Bottom Line/Personal interviewed Harold S. Kushner, Rabbi Laureate of Temple Israel in Natick, Massachusetts. He is author of numerous best-selling books, including When Bad Things Happen to Good People and, most recently, Overcoming Life’s Disappointments (both from Anchor). No Plunger? No Problem. Secret to Unplugging Your Toilet "My toilet was stopped up. My guests were on their way. And I couldn't find a plunger!" Lucky for me, I'd learned the secret: Just squirt some liquid dish detergent, wait 15 minutes, and my home and guests were good to go. How often have you been caught in a situation like this -- or any of thousands of other household mishaps? Spills, breaks, lost items -- family heirlooms nearly ruined. Too often, right? Joan and Lydia Wilen, better known to TV viewers as "The Wilen Sisters," have the secret to saving the day on these and thousands of other potentially disastrous mishaps. Learn more... Cheap, Uncertified Electrical Items Can Be Dangerous Anthony Toderian CSA International Cheap, uncertified electrical items can be dangerous -- and they are becoming more common as people search for bargains. Improperly made items, such as extension cords and power tools, can cause injuries and fires. Self-defense: Avoid items whose labels do not provide the manufacturer’s contact information... ones without UPC bar codes... ones without any branding or certification marks... and ones with spelling and grammatical errors on packages. Be especially careful when buying products online. Bottom Line/Personal interviewed Anthony Toderian, spokesperson, CSA International, which tests and certifies consumer electronics and other products, Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Introducing Bottom Line on the Radio (and Listen Live on the Web) Sarah Hiner, publisher of Bottom Line Publications and Daily Health News, is bringing the information you love to the radio -- every Saturday afternoon 4-6pm (Eastern time). In Bottom Line style, Bottom Line On Your Health talks to mainstream and naturopathic medical experts about the many and confusing options in health care... helping people to know that they have choices in a medical world that increasingly focuses on drugs and surgery as a first line treatment. You can even call in with your own questions for her medical experts, Dr. Andrew Rubman, ND, Contributing Medical Editor for Bottom Line Publications and Dr. Max Gomez, Emmy Award Winning Medical Journalist. Listen live every Saturday in Connecticut at 4:00pm at 1400am WSTC/1350am WNLK or streaming live on the web at www.wstcwnlk.com. Important: Help your friends get much more out of life -- forward this E-letter to them. Better: Send it to many friends and your whole family. This is a free weekly e-mail service of BottomLineSecrets.com and Boardroom Inc. Boardroom Inc. 281 Tresser Boulevard Stamford, CT 06901-3229 ATTN: Web Team You received this e-mail because you have requested it. 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